Beauty vs what I need

I wish I was capable, of making something beautiful,
With clay I would carefully mold out the base,
Intricate details I'd lovingly trace,
Into creases unknown and unseen,
I would make the most marvelous dream,
I would make something beautiful.

With music I'd carve out a world of my own,
Where music is freedom and I'm not alone,
And everyone would come and marvel at my song,
and in melody sweet, we would all sing along,
and I would make something beautiful.

If I could paint a picture with words,
Or create a song where true Life is heard,
If I could draw some marvelous thing,
Or dance till the moon joined into sing.
Even in my brilliance, if I captured their love,
Still in the stillness, it would not be enough.

For beauty is fading in everyone's eyes,
And with beauty comes fear, and in fear beauty dies.
With what I create, could it satisfy,
Could it restore what is empty, break down all the lies,
That have risen and choked what is beauty in me,
But in this moment, it is now that I see,
That I may never be able to make what is beautiful,
But that is not what I need,
What I need, what I need, what I need is peace.